I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
