I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
