Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize