I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
should my penis look like a turkey
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
