You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
