So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize