If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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