Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
