Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
