I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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