Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
