i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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