He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
