You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
