So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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