No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Randomize
