Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
