My first STD was from a foam party
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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