Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize