Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
It's blow job season.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
