I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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