Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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