I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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