Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
