Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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