physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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