Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize