Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
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