just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
