Please don't use social media to get back at me.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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