Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You are the jesus of drinking
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
