He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
