omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
