Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
