I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
