I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
