Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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