And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
We need to get me chipped asap
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
