How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
