therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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