You work out of a Hotel?
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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