I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We got so high we made milksteak
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
