HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I will die if light touches me.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
