You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
