nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
