Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
