We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
