tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
