We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
