It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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